Thursday, August 16, 2012
...I have not ridden my scooter since July 12th! There, I said it. And I feel miserable and yet still can't get myself to get on it and ride.
Day after day I take the cover off and say I will take it out that day and then I don't. Too lazy, too distracted, too busy, too tired, blah, blah, blah.
Granted it's been way too hot some days, raining and storming others, or I've been working or busy or whatnot. But it's more than that and I am struggling to define why I am not riding now.
Part of it has to do with personal stresses that take my concentration to the point that I would not feel focused enough to ride safely.
Another part of it is that I am feeling tired of riding alone all the time or riding to the same places all the time. Boredom has set in.
Also when I feel anxious or depressed about stresses I want to "nest" in my house or on my back porch and not leave the calmness and comfort of my home and my canine companions.
I could add more layers of excuses and I'm not sure I'd really come up with an explanation that would suit me or really define why I am not riding.
It's some kind of "dry spell" that I can't explain. Maybe I need a vacation from the routine. Not sure.
Anyway, this is the way it is for now and I'm wondering...am I the only one who has gone through an extended time of not riding (by choice!) such as this?
Oddly too, it seems the more I don't ride the less I want to push myself to ride.
I love my scooter, but her battery is running down now. I do go out and start her up and let her run on the stand to keep it revved.
I feel I really am a neglectful owner in addition to a curious mixture of laziness, apathy, and "supreme-guilt-on-a-stick".
So I write about lazy dogs and wooley worms and time that is passing by as summer slips into autumn...but not scooting. At least not just now...