Thursday, April 23, 2015
NOTE: Since the original posting of this blog some resolution appears to be in the works. I went to the business owner and expressed my dire need for 2 regular days off in a row AND that "I need to make more money". Well, he immediately was fine with my being off on Mondays, which was my preference! Also, he said he is working on some ideas that might give me more responsibilities on the days that I AM working, like picking up some pieces from florists on my way into the warehouse. So talking with him really was the way to go. In addition, I have resolved to get in bed by midnight, read a bit if I feel like it, and be up by between 7-8 am. I am slowly working it down to 7 am and by summer should be up by 6 am, which has always been my habit in the summer. If I stick to this schedule, I should have plenty of time to do things in the morning BEFORE I head out to pick up my flowers at 1 or even if I have to make a few stops on the way. I am really happy about this new direction and hope it works out for me.
I haven't blogged because my life has become a whirlwind of work and recovering from WORK!
Yeah, I'm loving my flower gig, but it dominates my life in ways that don't really make sense.
I feel like I am "getting ready to go to work" in the few hours I have in the morning and "relaxing after work" in the few hours in the evening.
And this is 6 days a week!
It's not hard labor, it's fun, but it is unpredictable and usually keeps me out on the road from noon to around 6pm. During this time I am picking up my flowers and then delivering them within a semi-rural area.
This is very pleasant work but pays very little. Very. I knew that going into it and at the time that was enough. It may continue to be, I don't know.
But my "life work" balance is off kilter. I am finding no time to ride the scooter, ride the bikes, hike with the dogs, and golf.
These are my few real passions and I really, really miss doing them.
Excuses? Sometimes I stay up late reading or watching TV or playing on the Kindle Fire and so I sleep in and my morning starts too late. There are dogs to feed and walk as well as myself and then I turn around and it is noon, time to leave.
I can get back home anywhere from 3:30 to 9:30pm, depending on how many orders I have and then that is unpredictable. Easter was very busy, Mother's Day will be the busiest of all.
"Busy" means more money and did I mention that this gig that I love does not pay that well? Yes, I did.
When I work Monday through Saturday with Sunday as my only day off, how do I get to: 1. relax 2. do errands 3. do chores 4. ride 5. anything else.
It doesn't happen.
Add in rain, cold weather that seems to never end, and the guilt of missing a day because someone else has to deliver all my orders now that I am not there and it all adds up to frustration.
So I am frustrated, tired, agitated, and starving for a few days for myself just to enjoy the time away from work doing things I want to do.
I am not sure what the solution is for me, but I am working on one.
Getting up earlier, cutting back to 5 days and "be damned let them figure it out" come into my mind as first steps.
Looking for another job is also crossing my mind ever so slightly.
Meanwhile I struggle with the sense of "no time" and the scooter and bikes gather dust.
My dogs get no outings and get stressed and depressed. They mirror my mood.
I feel like I spend a lot of time here...
And, yes, I'll take some cheese with that whine...
End of rant...for now!